Misguided Superhero Valentine’s Day Cards

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Exchanging cute cards featuring fictional characters and romantic phrases is a holiday tradition as old as candy hearts with silly phrases on them. What better way to let the object of your affection feel loved and appreciated than by giving him or her a message from their favorite superhero? Sometimes, though, a seemingly sweet pun from Spider-Man just sounds more like a reference to auto-erotic asphyxiation.

Other times, a nice superhero pun or innuendo is just wildly inappropriate for the youngsters who will actually receive these cards. Take a look at these superhero-themed Valentine’s Day cards that may have missed the mark when it comes to courting young love. Some of these cards might be available online, so if you feel like creeping out a loved one, make sure to stock up on misguided Valentine’s Day superhero cards! If not, just vote up the funniest comic book Valentine’s cards.

Sounds Like True Love

Great Pun, but Maybe Not for Kids?

🙁 Okay….

From  ebay

Spider-Man: Master of the Erotic Pun

Moving the Planet Would Effectively Kill Us All. Thanks Wonder Woman!

From  ebay

Wait, So Do You Get All Three or Do You Have to Pick One?

From  ebay

That Sounds Like it Hurts, Robin

Maybe Retract the Claws?

Romance, Thy Name Be Mjolnir!

Bros Can Give Cards Too, Okay?

This Would Be Cute, Presuming Your Valentine is a Swinger

I Hear Locomotives Are Terrible Lovers

The Dark Knight and the Nefarious Friendzone

Mmmm… Pizza…

Oh My God This is Terrifying Please Unthaw that Woman

Well This Sounds Mildly Threatening

Hey, It’s a Horribly Disproportionate Drawing of Catwoman!

That’s Lust, Not Love, Animal Man

That’s Why I’m Chasing You: To Catch You!

From ebay

It’s Your Patriotic Duty

Pretty Sure I’ve Heard This Song Before

He Will Find You, and He Will Smooch You

I Love You Like Joker Loves Having Limbs!

Remember: Joker Once KILLED Robin

From  ebay

I Don’t Know Which is Worse, “You’re In My Power” or “Sproing!”

Be Mine or Batman and Superman Will Beat You Up